Trump International Four Seasons Presidential Library

Every President is expected to have a library established in a special location to house important documents, media, and artifacts from his/her term in office for public viewing and for future scholars. LOL.

WE hereby declare that Four Seasons Total Landscaping in Philadelphia be preserved as the site for the Trump Family Presidential Library. Rudy G and a cast of dozens will dedicate these Hollow Grounds at 12:01pm on January 20, 2021. The Donald Trump baby ballon is en route for the Grand Opening!

Trump Library Logo (Matchbook Cover)

In the Library

  • Thee Un-redacted Mueller report.
  • A searchable Archive of Trump Tweets as @realDonaldTrump and @POTUS.
  • A searchable Archive of Trump Executive Orders.
  • A searchable Compilation of Lies (aka The Trump Liebrary).
  • Trump Tax Returns.
  • $35k check from Trump to Cohen, reimbursement for Stormy's hush money.
  • Love Letters from North Korean leader Kim Jong Un.
  • The Inauguration Day letter Obama left for Trump.
  • Health Plan binder presented to Leslie Stahl by Kayleigh McDoodle.
  • Actual SOTU torn up by Nancy Pelosi.
  • Hilary's 30,000 Emails!
  • Other Documents for future scholars and psychologists to study.

Curated Memorabilia on Display

  • Red MAGA Hat, Trump/Pence 2016/2020 Flags and Lawn Signs.
  • Trump's golf clubs and golf cart.
  • Trump's signature white Polo shirt. White MAGA hat.
  • Thee Bible that Trump held up in front of St John’s Church on June 1, 2020.
  • Purple Heart gifted to Trump by retired Army Lt. Col. Louis Dorfman on Aug. 2, 2016, in Ashburn, Va.
  • Trump's many Noble Peace Prizes.
  • Thee Trump iPhone.
  • Honda lawnmower used by 11-year old boy to mow White House lawn.
  • Melania's green I DON'T REALLY CARE, DO U? jacket.
  • Hunter Biden Laptops.
  • Elevator Shoes worn By Trump. (Escalator Shoes?)
  • 6' Red Tie, Displayed with Scotch Tape used in place of a tie bar.
  • Umbrella used by Trump when boarding Air Force One.
  • Orange Makeup Kit, including application brushes used by Trump.
  • Lifelike replica of Trump gladly donated by Madame Tussauds wax museum.
  • Hmmm, anything given to Trump by Putin?


  • Multi Media Displays — Sara Cooper TikTok videos on continuous loop.
  • Disney Animatronic of Trump delivering GettysBurg Address.
  • Outdoor dumpster fires commemorating special events of the Trump presidency.
  • Leaf Raking Activity (Rake Rental, $10).
  • SNL Skits featuring Trump.
  • Backroom only — The Pee Pee Tape!

In The Grift Shop

  • LAWN AND ORDER T-shirt ... Make America Rake Again
  • Presidential Coins
  • Tiki Torches ($100)
  • Sharpie markers, embossed with Presidential Seal
  • Sharpie markers, Gold-Plated, embossed with Make America Gold Again
  • GOYA beans and other fine GOYA products
  • My Pillow
  • Framed TIME magazine covers (faked and real)
  • Best Seller: The Art of the Deal
  • Roll of paper towels
  • McCafe coming soon!

The Backstory behind our location (Subject to Confirmation)

The museum will Occupy the site of Four Seasons Total Landscaping in Philadelphia, located between a dildo shop and a crematorium.

How Did We Get Here!? Trump tweeted that they were going to have a presser at the Four Seasons in Philly, before his team knew to book it.

Facts: Trump announced via twitter a press conference at Philadelphia's Four Seasons at 11. Shortly after, Trump tweeted it would be at Four Seasons Total Landscaping at 11:30.

We submit that the Four Seasons Hotel wanted nothing to do with him, so Team Trump scrambled to find a place named Four Seasons to hold the presser, and found this Landscaping outfit conveniently located right off the Interstate. So they set up there — in order to save face for Trump. Major Self-Own!

Press Conference held at Four Seasons Total Landscaping on Saturday, November 7, 2020 (No photographer credited - Sorry!)

Other Trump Presidential Library Proposals




  • Sarah Cooper — How to Medical (From Trump Press briefing 4/23/20) [YouTube]
  • Donald Trump baby balloon [Wikipedia]
  • Four Seasons Total Landscaping, est. 1992 [fstl1992]
  • Exclusive interview with the Trump staffer who booked Four Seasons Total Landscaping. [Al Franken Podcast]
  • More to be added soon...


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